


You Make Me Blind

by imjaebumism



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Hyungwon's an entire mess, Idk what to tag this tbh, M/M, Modeling, Rating for cursing and dick talk, hoseok's adorable, whats new
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-25 11:07:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16196306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imjaebumism/pseuds/imjaebumism
Summary: '"I'm not gay." Hyungwon says quietly, never able to say the word too loud, "and my friend's a dick. Sorry that I led you on and freaked out, which in turn made you think you had to be kind enough to help me get my friend home. I'm just- sorry for everything. You're a good guy and I should've let you go for someone who wouldn't blue ball you."'An entire joke in which Hyungwon saying 'I'm not gay' is the punchline.





	You Make Me Blind

Hyungwon didn't know what had possessed him to say yes when Jooheon had offered the brilliant idea of a night out dancing at a gay club.

He regretted it the second they walked into the room. The room that was just too warm and too bright and too stifled with sweaty bodies (sweaty _gay_  bodies) to be even the slightest bit comfortable.

Tugging Jooheon back into the safety of the vestibule behind the heavy doors, Hyungwon throws Jooheon a incredulous look, eyes wide as his artificially brown fringe falls into his face, "we can't stay in there."

Jooheon makes a face, brushing Hyungwon's hand off his wrist and stepping out of the way of the people shoving to get into the club. "And why not? Do you hear that music? I'm ready to dance all night, man." Says Jooheon, body already vibrating to the beat that they could only just hear whenever the door is shut behind them. He's smiling all wide, eyes bright and cheeks flushed as he starts dancing in place.

"Jooheon-ah, we're at a _fucking_  gay club." Hyungwon leans into Jooheon's space, lowering his voice, his own eyes darting around the room at the many variations of scantly clad men coming and going, willing them not to linger too long on wayward patches of skin.

"Yeah? And? Neither of us are gay!" He says back like that saying makes it all the more reason for they to go in and have gay guys rubbing against them all night because the 'musics good', "look, you've been stressed so we're here to have a good time. Just stick with me! It'll be fine."

Now Hyungwon's in disbelief that _that's_  what gets him following behind Jooheon, dodging the hands of multiple men trying to frisk him on their way to the bar.

There's a fair amount of bodies at the bar, but not nearly as much as there are on the dance floor, and Hyungwon leans back against it, watching the wave of bodies ebbing and flowing with the rhythm of the music blaring through the speakers. "Here." Jooheon says loud, just over the bass line as, handing over a cup filled with ice and some amber liquid that Hyungwon scrunches his nose at the smell of.

"What is it?" He asks cautiously, keeping it an arms length away from him and watching Jooheon quickly down his own.

"My fucking piss, hyung. Stop asking dumb questions and drink it!" Jooheon says saucily, leaving his now empty cup on the bar and looking around while Hyungwon takes a sip of his drink.

It's strong. Stronger than the stuff he only ever indulges in when he's at unbearable model connection parties or agency events. He doesn't usually enjoy alcohol, but the odd glass of wine and champagne usually calms his perpetually frayed nerves enough for him to get through those drawn out nights and endless conversations with 'important' strangers.

"I'm going to dance!" Jooheon calls over the music, leaning in to scream in Hyungwon's ear.

"No, you said to stick by you!" Hyungwon says, eyes widening as he hangs onto Jooheon's forearm.

"So come with me!"

That wasn't an option. There were _men_  out there. Men who liked men. Men who would no doubt try to touch him and talk to him and _get_  with him and Hyungwon couldn't deal with that right now. Why did he ever agree to coming here?

"No," Hyungwon says fearfully, shaking his head.

"Then stay here, I'll come find you later!" Jooheon says, getting out of Hyungwon's tight grip and disappearing into the throng of people, leaving Hyungwon alone with sweaty palms and a thundering heart in his chest as he turned to lean onto the bar, finishing his drink quickly with his haste to have something to do other than just stand there and _die_. The black choker around his neck suddenly felt like it was doing its job.

Not knowing what else to do, Hyungwon orders another drink, something different from what Jooheon had gotten him before, something more his style. The second drink does well to dull the pounding in his head, keeping him from thinking too hard about where he was and why he felt so uncomfortable. The entire environment had him all the way on edge, his skin crawling with the way the men here just seemed to be so uninhibited, standing to each other close while talking, dancing suggestively against each other while talking, standing in dark corners and making out. They seemed so open and free, in stark contrast to how these men probably were when the sun was out, straight laced and unassuming, some of them probably with wives and kids, leaving this part of them for when they have a couple of hours at night to sweat it out.

Needless to say, his second drink turns into a third.

Hyungwon wasn't as much of a lightweight as he was a feather when it came to ingesting alcohol. It was like his body soaked it up like a sponge and even the wine and champagne he usually drinks are enough to have his head swimming by the end of the night.

Much like it was now.

It's probably why he doesn't notice the electricity that's no doubt been there for a while, running from his left arm, over his shoulder.

"Hi," the voice comes with another current of electricity as Hyungwon looks over, giving the stranger his attention. Give the _handsome_  stranger all of his attention.

The alcohol and circumstance leaves him in a sort of shocked silence in which he takes his time to trail his eyes over the guy in the smoky atmosphere of the club. He was very easily one of the most good looking guys Hyungwon had ever seen, with his ash colored hair and almond shaped eyes. And that _smile_. That panty dropping insinuation dripping smile, perfect rows of teeth surrounded by plump pink lips. Hyungwon was a _model_  who saw handsome man all of the time, who was sometimes posed nearly naked with them for many a questionable photo shoot. He wasn't used to being this unhinged and just immediately attracted to one.

In hindsight, he blames it all on the alcohol.

"Can I buy you another drink?" The man asks, leaning against the counter next to where Hyungwon had been sitting, smile growing at the very obvious fact that Hyungwon couldn't keep his eyes off of him.

Unable to answer the man vocally, Hyungwon just shrugs and tilts his head, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth.

There's a new drink in front of him in seconds and Hyungwon wonders how this man knew what he'd been drinking but doesn't ask, because he can't ask. The man is wearing what must be the world's tightest black shirt, the short sleeves cutting right around the thickest, most muscular part of his pale arm. His jeans are tight too, except Hyungwon just guesses that because he can't really see them without looking down and being too obvious, even though he's basically already sold himself at this point.

Which is proven when the man speaks to him again, "are you- you going to ask me to dance or just keep staring at me like I'm a piece of meat?" Hyungwon's eyes snap up, meeting the man's bright coquettish smirk before frowning.

"Dance?" Hyungwon asks, placing the tiny straw he'd got with his drink into his mouth and taking a sip. He pretends he doesn't notice the way the man's eyes follow the motion, transfixed with the movement of Hyungwon's mouth.

"Mmh," the guy nods, leaning in so he doesn't have to yell over the music, "this might just be the best song of the night and most people come to clubs for the dancing."

Hyungwon plays with the straw in his mouth, chewing on it and holding his cup with both hands, "I can't dance."

The man raises an eyebrow and Hyungwon immediately wants to know how he pulls off his expressions, what seems to be a near constant mix of mirth filled coyness that apparently Hyungwon can't seem to get enough of.

"That's okay with me," he says with a smile, "I can dance enough for the both of us."

Now, with that line Normal Hyungwon would just laugh in this guy's face and leave, he wouldn't feel his gaze glaze over or have his heart beat scarily fast in his chest. His mouth goes slack and he looks down before hopping from the stool, placing his cup down and standing closer to the guy. He could smell his aftershave and cologne and he doesn't think he's ever smelled a mixture of something so delicious in his life. Hyungwon's also taller than this man, which he realizes the second he steps back and nearly tripped, unsteady on his feet. He blames the alcohol, but the guy reaches out and steadies him, his hand warm and heavy on the Hyungwon's back as he steps back into Hyungwon's space.

"You good?" The guy asks, looking gleeful, his hand feeling like it was going to burn through Hyungwon's shirt.

"Yeah, so, dancing?" Hyungwon says and the stranger seems to chuckle, watching Hyungwon like he didn't know what to expect from him next. He nods though and they make it to the dance floor, shuffling between sweaty bodies until they're right in the thick of it and Hyungwon probably would've lost his stranger if he wasn't holding on so tightly to his hand.

Hyungwon just stands there when they've stopped, turning around to meet those smirking eyes. Can you imagine? _Eyes smirking_.

"Can you literally not dance?" Smirky eyes says, body naturally seeming to move to the beat and Hyungwon's already jealous. He can't move like that, he can't dance without knocking himself or someone else in the eye. His limbs are too long, he's too uncoordinated and he has two left feet. He can't do anything to embarrass himself right now, not in front of this guy with the killer smile and deathly biceps. He didn't know when he started caring about being embarrassing or seeming weird in front of a _guy_ , but there it was right then, tightening around his throat and turning his cheeks bright red and hot.

"I- might hurt you." He speaks like that, with odd pauses in random places, barely able to keep the other man's unnerving gaze.

He laughs, "its that bad, huh? Just don't think about it."

Hyungwon huffs on a short mirthless half-laugh because that sounds easy. But it's not. Hyungwon can't turn his mind off, he's _always_  thinking about something, and knowing that he's got a penchant for fucking things like this up with his loose lips and sinking ships habit, it makes it all the more hard to just- stop.

But the stranger reaches up and places his firm hands on Hyungwon's hips, swinging them side to side slowly while Hyungwon stayed stiff like a wood plank in the wind. "Relax, no ones judging here." The man says with his soft yet deep voice, causing a shiver to run straight down Hyungwon's spine. He focuses on the man, his hands, his body movements and tries turning his mind off, eventually finding a natural way to move his body without causing bodily harm to himself or others.

Once he gets the hang of _that_ , he focuses on the fact that they're standing really close, like there's barely centimeters between them and Hyungwon can feel the shared warmth that's radiating in the space that separates them, his breaths going heavy.

"See? It's not that bad." Stranger breathes, looking up and meeting Hyungwon's eyes.

"I don't even know your name." Hyungwon says, out of nowhere, wincing when he realizes how stupid he sounds.

The man just laughs, "it's Hoseok. Lee Hoseok."

"Hoseok. Hyungwon," Hyungwon says quietly, lips barely moving as he points to himself. He barely even knows if they're dancing to the beat anymore. They're standing close and Hyungwon's definitely _moving_  but he can't really hear the music through the ringing and rushing water sounds in his ears.

They keep dancing.

Hoseok is really good at it. He's got control of his body that, again, Hyungwon envies. He doesn't get to see too much more of it in action, though, once he's turned around and dancing with his back to Hoseok. It's easier for him to let loose like that, when he doesn't have to see the unnerving fact that Hoseok is literally the most perfect guy he's ever seen and he's dancing with _Hyungwon_.

There's another thing that bothers Hyungwon, the undeniable fact that he's into this. He finds Hoseok attractive, enjoys that Hoseok is obviously into him, but he isn't gay. Which at this point seems like a shame because Hoseok's strong and very capable body feels nice behind him, and he's been drinking and he's more into this than he probably should be.

It gets anxiety inducing once Hoseok leans in close, their lips only centimeters away, making to kiss him. Hyungwon hadn't minded the warm hand on his neck, keeping him close enough to take in Hoseok's subtle cologne with every breath. He hadn't even minded the fact that they were leaning their foreheads together for however long it takes for that to look not-so-straight. But a kiss was totally pushing it, Hyungwon couldn't do that.

He automatically jerks back when Hoseok gets close enough that he has to cross his eyes to keep Hoseok's gaze, his face flushing with heat. He's moving before he can help it, slipping out of Hoseok's hold and forcing his way off the dance floor, past the gyrating bodies and the overall embarrassment of the situation, his teeth worrying his bottom lip.

Hyungwon doesn't notice Hoseok following him and calling his name until he's standing back by the bar, leaning against it to catch his breath and calm himself down. Hoseok seeking him out and placing a hand on his arm doesn't help, Hoseok apologizing and blaming himself helps even less.

"I'm sorry, are you okay? I didn't mean to freak you out." Hoseok says, trying in vain to calm Hyungwon down by rubbing it out of his arm. "Easy now, breathe," Hoseok says when he sees Hyungwon acting up, "I swear I won't force myself on you, I just want to make sure you're okay before I leave you alone."

Hyungwon takes a few deep breaths, leaning back against the counter and meeting Hoseok's gaze. He's surprised to find the obvious worry in Hoseok's eyes is genuine, that he actually cares that Hyungwon makes it through this panic attack. He's able to calm himself down enough to speak without throwing his throat into near spasms, finding an ironic sense of comfort in Hoseok's touch.

"You didn't freak me out." Hyungwon says quietly, too quiet to hear over the music if Hoseok wasn't standing so close, waiting to hang off his every word. "I freaked myself out, I'm sorry. I should tell you I'm not-,"

"Hyung! Hyung!" Jooheon's voice is loud reaching over the music. Hyungwon looks up to find his friend pushing through the swarm of bodies, waving his hand, dimples deep and visible even from so far that Hyungwon doesn't have to squint to see them. When he gets close, Hyungwon can see he's not completely there, his pupils blown wide and grin bright. His speech slurs almost as bad as Hyungwon's when he _isn't_  drunk and he falls into Hyungwon, shoving between him and Hoseok who takes a step back. "Hyungwon-hyung, are you having as much fun as I am? I think we should come here every weekend. The gays know how to have fun."

Hyungwon's mortified, looking over at Hoseok with a look that screams he barely knows this guy when Jooheon sways and Hyungwon reaches out to steady him, "yeah, not sure if that's the best idea. Maybe we should get you home, Jooheon-ah."

"But I don't wanna! They love me here!" Jooheon whines, slipping out of Hyungwon's grip so bad that Hoseok reaches out to help hold him up too. "Yah- who's this? Hyungwon-hyung you dog! I didn't think you'd be getting laid tonight! Having more fun than me I see."

Hyungwon rolls his eyes, tugging Jooheon's arm over his shoulder and holding him up with an arm around his waist. "Let's get you home."

He starts to walk with Jooheon out of the club, but his sagging only worsens with his whining and Hyungwon's taller and bigger than most but he's lanky and has the upper body strength of a newborn baby.

Which is how they end up with Jooheon on Hoseok's back, piggy style, head lolling on Hoseok's shoulder _nearly_  passed out save for a few questionable mutterings. Hyungwon walks beside them, pulling his jacket around his body, arms wrapped around his middle.

"Thank you again, for this. You really didn't have to." Hyungwon says, bracing himself against the chilly night on the overheated skin of his face.

"It's no worries, you said you didn't live far and neither do I. Surge rates for a cab seem unnecessary." Hoseok smiles, looking like carrying Jooheon on his back was effortless. He barely adjusts Jooheon's dead weight.

"I'm sorry-,"

"Your people are very generous." Jooheon slurs, eyes still closed but speaking to Hoseok.

Hoseok smirks, "my people?"

"The gays. All wanted to buy me drinks. Couldn't say 'no'." Hyungwon's at level 100/10 of embarrassment at this point, grimacing at Jooheon's comments, "dance good, too."

"Just ignore him." Hyungwon sighs, stuffing his hands in his pockets as they continue to walk.

"Don't ignore me!" Jooheon starts, but groans and trails off passing out again on Hoseok's shoulder.

The other man looks very amused which Hyungwon bites his lip at him, "sorry."

"Stop apologizing." Hoseok says, looking over at Hyungwon with those kind eyes. "I don't even know what you keep being sorry for."

"I'm not gay." Hyungwon says quietly, never able to say the word too loud, "and my friend's a dick. Sorry that I led you on and freaked out, which in turn made you think you had to be kind enough to help me get my friend home. I'm just- sorry for everything. You're a good guy and I should've let you go for someone who wouldn't blue ball you."

"You didn't lead me on. I shouldn't have assumed." And that sounds silly because _Hyungwon_  had been the one who was out of place. He'd been the one dancing with a guy in a gay club. It doesn't matter that he had _wanted_  to say yes the whole time, that he had enjoyed it while it lasted and, for a split second, he had wondered what Hoseok's lips would feel like against his. It doesn't matter because he shouldn't have wanted it or enjoyed anything. He's not gay. "Don't be sorry about your friend either. He's drunk, he has no idea what he's saying. It _is_  funny, though."

"It's not that you're not handsome." Hyungwon continues, because he's not much of a talker when he's sober, but he apparently can't shut his fucking mouth when he's got a few drinks in him. "I'd probably be into you if I _were_  gay."

_Shut up shut up shut up shut up._

Hoseok just hums with that perpetually amused smirk on his face.

"But I'm not so-,"

"Right."

"Which is a shame cause you're a great dancer."

Hoseok chuckles, simply raising an eyebrow at Hyungwon, eyes alight.

"What? I'm just being honest." Hyungwon shrugs, blowing his cheeks out and trying to will himself to shut up.

"I appreciate it." Hoseok nods.

Hyungwon and Jooheon's building is right at the corner, visible to Hyungwon from where he's standing and he tells Hoseok as much.

"You live there?" Hoseok asks, voice oddly edged.

Hyungwon nods and Hoseok doesn't say anything for the rest of the way so neither does Hyungwon until they've reached his shared apartment with Jooheon and Hoseok deposits the man into his bed.

"Thank you, again." Hyungwon says as he's walking Hoseok out, ready to lead him out of the building.

"It's no problem." Hoseok replies, again with that smile. "It was nice meeting you."

Hyungwon doubts that, tonight was more trouble than he's probably worth and he'd probably never see Hoseok again, but he could pretend for the time they had left.

"You too, maybe we'll see each other around sometime." Hyungwon shrugs. He didn't see himself frequenting another gay bar anytime soon, didn't even know if that was Hoseok's regular scene, but Seoul was big but small at the same time, maybe he'd see Hoseok walking about somewhere and maybe they'd say hi to each other. It could be a thing.

"Oh, yeah. I don't think that'll be a problem." Hoseok smirks, Hyungwon's heart bottoming out when as he's standing against his front door, Hoseok moves to unlock the door to the apartment right next to him, completely throwing him off, "goodnight, Hyungwon-ssi." He says before disappearing and Hyungwon wills death upon himself right then and there.

Literally, fuck his life.

-

The next morning finds Hyungwon in better shape than his crass, attention hungry counterpart he calls a roommate which really doesn't mean much considering even when Hyungwon isn't hungover like Jooheon, he still acts like he is, with his normal expression constantly fixed like he could vomit any second.

"Morning!" Hyungwon says as cheerily as he (being who he is) could possibly be once Jooheon makes himself get out of bed and join the world of the living. "I made you coffee and ordered hangover soup from your favorite-,"

"Hyung, shush," Jooheon groans, sitting at the counter in their kitchen and resting his head on his arms, grimacing. "You're being so fucking loud." Which within itself is odd because Hyungwon's sure his voice can't physically go above what's considered 'indoor appropriate'. "Please just give me whatever you have _quietly_."

Hyungwon rolls his eyes, pouring Jooheon a cup of coffee, fixing it the way he likes and placing the steaming bowl of soup in front of him. "Thank you, angel. I'd be nothing without you."

It isn't until a few sips from his coffee and a couple bites of the soup that Jooheon's able to hold up a conversation.

"So, last night was crazy."

"For you," Hyungwon reminds, leaning back against the kitchen counter and sipping from his mug using two hands. "You're the one who went all Freddy Mercury and decided to make that club your bitch."

"Well I feel like the bitch now." Jooheon groans, focusing on finishing his soup spoon by spoon. He takes a second to look at himself, eyes traveling the length of his arms, looking down the neck hole of his shirt and even dipping his head to look under his shorts, "no new bruises, how'd I get home safely if you didn't _drag_  me? We both know your boney ass didn't carry me all the way here."

Hyungwon fixes his jaw, glaring at his roommate, "why do we even have hyung/dongsaeng statues if you're never going to treat me like a hyung?"

"I don't know man. So how'd I get here?"

"Our _neighbor_  carried you." Hyungwon says, finishing his coffee and moving to rinse out the cup.

"Our neighbor? You mean Wonho-hyung?" Jooheon asks while Hyungwon's back is turned, missing Hyungwon's frown.

"Who?"

"Our neighbor, he lives right there." Hyungwon turns around just soon enough to catch Jooheon throwing an arm in the vague direction of Hoseok's apartment before picking up the bowl to slurp up the leftovers, "I didn't know he was gay."

Hyungwon doesn't get too caught up on the fact that them being a corner apartment leaves them with only one neighbor and Hoseok's name wasn't Wonho last time he'd been introduced. Maybe Hoseok had a roommate. "We're not gay." Hyungwon reminds, letting Jooheon know that one doesn't necessarily have to be gay to have been at the club to carry Jooheon home.

"Right," the way he says it makes it seem like Hyungwon's missing out on a joke, "I guess. But that's not the point. If Wonho hyung carried me home, I should probably thank him."

Hyungwon just hums, turning back around to wipe down the counters.

"Maybe we should invite him over for dinner sometime. Get to know him." Hyungwon's hand freezes at that. It'd only be a matter of time before Jooheon realized that Wonho hadn't been the one to carry him home and then he'd invite Hoseok. Hyungwon didn't really ever want to see Hoseok ever again, nothing more than just a casual run-by for the odd times Hyungwon is ever out in the hallways whenever a normal person is, when he's more likely than not to be rushing to one schedule or another. Life as a model left him with a fucked schedule, one when he was always up early enough to hear the birds chirping and late enough to see the sunrise before he fell face first onto his bed. Which regrettably, he never seemed to have a lot of time with. Life as an _introverted_  model also made sure of the fact that whenever Hyungwon _was_  home, he wasn't spending his time trying to get to know the neighbors, which is probably why he'd lived in this building with Jooheon for years and never knew that Hoseok lived right next to him.

"We don't cook." Hyungwon reminds Jooheon, trying to make up a rational reason why they shouldn't do something nice for someone who selflessly helped a stranger home. His excuse also wasn't a lie, the only cookable thing they ever used the stove for was ramen and Hyungwon had a hard time even making _that_  come out good.

"We could order something, it's the thought that counts." Jooheon says, collecting his dishes and bringing them to the sink. "It's not everyday you have a dude willing to carry another dude all the way to his apartment."

Hyungwon sighs, willing with his eyes closed for the earth to just cave in and swallow him while right now, "I'm busy every night this week."

"It doesn't have to be this week, I'll head over and let him know what's up. See when he's free."

"I'm busy next week too."

"You don't have to be here when it happens, hyung." Jooheon says sharply, looking at Hyungwon with an expression where his dimples standout more on his face, his jaw set, "why are you acting weird?"

"I'm not acting weird." Not any weirder than he normally acts, he could argue. He could be a lot weirder.

"Yeah, you are." Jooheon finishes washing his dishes, leaving them on the drying rack and wiping his hands with a dishrag, "I'm gonna go shower. Thanks for the food." Jooheon says, dragging himself back to his room and then into the bathroom they share, the door clicking shut silently.

Hyungwon sighs, making a face as he finishes wiping down the counters and hanging the towel out flat to dry. Whatever Jooheon decided to do, Hyungwon was going to make it his prerogative to never see Lee Hoseok again. Even if he did live right next door.

-

Hoseok's apparently a pretty allusive character himself.

As much as Jooheon tries, he can't seem to get a hold of the man for the next two weeks. Knocks on his door stirred barely any sign of anyone being home and whenever Jooheon _did_  end up getting to ask him, he was busy.

Hyungwon figures busy meant _really_  busy. Unlike Hyungwon who was busy but was also making a conscious effort not to have them cross paths again.

All in all, after that morning, everything seems to go back to normal. It's more flashing lights, late nights and early mornings for Hyungwon. Fake smiles and sultry gazes, having to meet with people he cares nothing about to plan out his future. Soon enough, it becomes like Lee Hoseok never really existed to begin with.

-

Hyungwon never had to make a conscious effort to not see Hoseok before he knew that his neighbor existed, but now it was like playing a game of cat and mouse with Hyungwon as the only knowing player.

It's weeks of looking out of the peephole before leaving the safety of his apartment and checking around corners before making a move before he actually runs into the guy again. Leave it for that time to be the only instance when he's too tired to have his guard up.

Also it's nearly 4 o'clock in the morning and no living, breathing human being who doesn't sell their life to the hedonistic modeling world should be up at this time, so Hyungwon felt a sense of cosmic-order fuckery fall on him with the fact that _this_  is what it thought he deserved.

He actually quite literally _runs_  into Hoseok, too, which should be a joke within itself, but Hyungwon's too tired to laugh about it.

"Sorry," Hoseok apologizes, steadying Hyungwon with his warm hands. It reminds him then of that night, what must've been nearly a month ago now, where he remarked the warmth of Hoseok's hands whenever they landed on any part of Hyungwon's body, how his touch was like a cup of gasoline and Hyungwon's being was the spark needed to light Hyungwon on fire. "Hyungwon-ssi." He says like he's shocked to see him, which, who wouldn't be? Hyungwon's shocked. He'd been successfully avoiding his neighbor for weeks and suddenly avoidance is nothing but a vague memory of his past.

"God, you're so warm." Hyungwon mumbles, voice more slurred than regular due to the fact that he's running on literally two hours of sleep in the span of 2 days. He was surprised they could even get a good picture out of him, then he thinks they probably couldn't which is why the shoot lasted so long. And he had to be up for another one in less than 4 hours. He unwittingly leans into Hoseok's warmth though, which would probably be hilarious with him being about an inch or two taller than Hoseok, seeing the way he curled into the smaller man's chest like a child. The warmth spreads through his entire body and he sighs, closing his eyes, "just-just five more minutes. I'll be good in five." He remembers himself muttering before everything went black.

-

There's some people who are able to wake up and look glorious while doing so. Hyungwon's friend Changhyuk is like that, he doesn't drool or snore or get icky eye crustys. He's a complete anomaly.

Hyungwon is a mess when he wakes up, let's just leave it at that.

"Hyungwon-ssi." Also, that's not Jooheon, and after rubbing the sleep out of his eyes from hearing his name being called by someone who wasn't his roommate, he realizes he's not in his room.

He's under a nice pile of covers that smell nothing like his own. The time he actually spends sleeping in his bed is so negligible that he doesn't even remember the last time he washed his own sheets, but they probably still smell fresh of washing detergent.

"Hyungwon-ssi, I wanted to let you sleep but your phone is blowing up and the man on the other side sounds very upset. He says it's Kihyun?" It takes him a moment but he realizes that that's Hoseok's voice. The same voice he's been regrettably dreaming about for almost a month now, and his blankets smell like the same Versace perfume that Hyungwon had spent a good amount of time at a department store during a shoot, getting a headache from smelling all of the bottles and trying to find the right one. He ended up just buying all of them and going on a rotating cycle to figure it out.

He was in Hoseok's room, in Hoseok's bed, under Hoseok's covers and he had no idea how he got there but... someone was calling him? And he said it was Kihyun- Kihyun. Fuck.

Hyungwon's up and snatching his phone from Hoseok's hand, putting it to his ear to catch the tail end of Kihyun's tirade, "-I work my ass off to get you this shoot and you throw a little diva tantrum and end up late?! The agency is going to have my ass for this but I bet you don't even care because you're too busy getting your dick sucked by some Bruce Wayne wanna-be. Who's voice is actually that deep anyway? I don't give a fuck if he says it's real, Hyungwon I swear if you don't-,"

"I'll be there in ten, okay? Just. Give me ten minutes." Hyungwon says hurriedly, hanging up the call and running frazzled fingers through his hair, "fuck." He curses, pressing his palms into his eyes and letting out a harsh breath.

"Hyungwon-ssi, are you okay?" Hoseok asks and Hyungwon looks at him, wondering how he managed to look endearing and worried at the same time. Right. Not gay.

"How'd I get in here?" Hyungwon asks, pocketing his phone and using Hoseok's armoire mirror to fix his hair and his face. A quick glance down has him finding the answer to all his dreams questions. Versace Eros. Of course. Maybe he could get a refund for the others and just buy half a gallon of that.

"You passed out when I ran into you outside and couldn't tell me what your passcode was. I knocked on your door but Jooheon wasn't home, so I brought you inside and hoped you were just tired and needed some sleep. I stayed outside the whole time. But then your phone started ringing."

"And Kihyun threatening to kill me and cut up my body had you freaking out a little. Fair." Hyungwon picks up the bottle of cologne and sprays a bit at his chakra points, placing it down and turning to meet Hoseok's gaze, masked by raised eyebrows, "question. If I had passed out not of fatigue but, let's say, malnutrition, on a scale of 1 to 10 how guilty would you feel if you had found me dead five hours later?"

"Probably a 12."

"Good. Think you can give me a lift to Gangnam? I only have 8 minutes and 45 seconds to get there."

Hoseok purses his lips and answers not a second later, "let me get my keys."

-

They get to the studio in nine minutes and twenty seconds but Hyungwon isn't as upset as Kihyun looks once he catches eyes with Hyungwon through the window of Hoseok's luxury SUV.

He's already cursing up a storm and before Hyungwon has a chance to place both feet onto the sidewalk, Kihyun is there, dragging him out.

"Bruce! Next time you decide you're going fuck the talent, do it on your own time. Not mine." He says threateningly with a finger pointed towards Hoseok.

"I didn't-,"

" _Not mine_!" Kihyun warns again, lips tight as he drags Hyungwon into the agency, fuming the whole way.

"Kihyun, I'm not gay." Hyungwon says once he's shoved into makeup, all the hands touching him in every place possible, preparing him for the shoot.

Kihyun's looking down at his phone, a perpetual frown in place between his eyebrows as he scratches at his head. He barely looks up at Hyungwon as he smirks and sucks his teeth, "sure, Hyungwon."

Hyungwon can't ask what he means by that before the stylists are tugging him into a dressing room, leaving him defenseless, naked and confused.

-

The next time he has any sort of free time is almost a week later.

It's relatively early when he's trudging from the elevator and down the hall to his apartment, feeling nearly dead on his feet. He's got a plan, though.

Instead of heading straight to his apartment and his bed, he walks over to Hoseok's, take out in hand and sleeves pulled over his fists as he knocks and waits. It's nearly midnight and he doesn't have to be up too early tomorrow, nights when he could get a full 8 hours of sleep are far and few between, but here he was, ruining it all for a chance to speak to his cute neighbor.

_Yes_  he was still straight, but that didn't mean he was _blind_. Hoseok was a handsome guy, Hyungwon could admit that.

Hoseok's door is pulled open without him even asking who it was, and Hyungwon offers a tired smile, raising the bag of take out he was holding and pushing off from the half wall he'd been leaning against.

"Peace offering. Friendly fire." Hyungwon says, his slur forever present in his words. "I hope you're hungry cause I went all out."

Hoseok smiles at him, standing in the doorway, holding the door, looking glorious in his plain black t-shirt and pajama pants, "had we been at war?"

"Maybe. Maybe not, but war isn't the only reason one would call for a truce."

"It's the main reason."

"Can I come in, or not?" Hyungwon asks, glaring at Hoseok who only smiles wider and moves aside to let Hyungwon in.

Since it's his first time entering Hoseok's apartment _awake_  Hyungwon takes his time surveying the spot while toeing off his shoes and slipping into Hoseok's extra pair of guest slippers.

"Sorry for bothering you. You hadn't been sleeping, right? I could leave if you want." Hyungwon says but he sees Hoseok's phone on the coffee table of Hoseok's living room and the tv is on, no blanket in site. He sets the bag of food on Hoseok's dining table.

"I wouldn't have let you in if I wanted you to leave." Hoseok says with a voice that's laced with a 'duh' he doesn't say. "I'd just been catching up on some dramas."

"Dramas huh?" Hyungwon smirks, tugging off his coat and ripping open the bag.

"Mmh, what'd you bring? If you knew me at all, you'd know I never turn away people with food. If it's a peace offering you want, you've got it." Hoseok says, bringing plates and utensils from the kitchen.

"I didn't know what you liked, so I got a little bit of everything."

"Right on the nose with that one."

Hyungwon laughs, unpacking the food and letting Hoseok take a look of everything. They end up sitting on the floor in the living room, food splayed out in front of them with some random new drama Hyungwon didn't know filling the breaks in conversation between them.

Hoseok eats well, like a bottomless pit, all the food Hyungwon brought is gone after three episodes, the two of them leaning back against the couch, completely stuffed.

"Jooheon's been trying to meet up with you. Say thanks for that night." Hyungwon says, lolling his head to one side so he doesn't have to strain to trace the curve of Hoseok's jaw with his eyes.

Hoseok's answer surprises him, "We met, actually. A few times."

"You meet with Jooheon? My roommate Jooheon?" Hyungwon asks incredulously, frowning at his neighbor.

"Mmh," Hoseok nods, "we met a couple days after the incident when I was free. Had coffee but he wanted to treat me to dinner so we met again a week later. We've met a couple times since. He's a cool guy."

Hyungwon's frown deepens, his gaze never dropping from Hoseok's face as he thinks on his words. Jooheon and Hoseok met? Why didn't Jooheon ever tell him? "You and Jooheon met. You're like, actively meeting. What, are you guys friends?"

"You could say that."

"What?" Hyungwon can't help the disbelief in his tone and Hoseok finally turns to look at him, reading the same tone in his expression.

"Mmh. I'm guessing he never told you because it seemed like you were avoiding me." Hoseok says blandly, shrugging a shoulder like it's nothing.

Hyungwon flounders like a fish, sitting up and shaking his head, "I hadn't been _avoiding_  you."

"Well it seemed like you were. At least to Jooheon."

"I wasn't. I wasn't avoiding you."

Hoseok's eyes Hyungwon some more, probably wondering why he was getting so worked up. "It's okay if you were."

"What?"

"I get that I might've freaked you out that night. Which I'm sorry for." Hoseok says, pink lips slightly pouty. "You made it pretty obvious you were straight and not interested and you had a _panic attack_  when it looked like I might kiss you. I made you uncomfortable, it's normal that you wouldn't want to see me after that."

"No." Hyungwon says almost immediately, shaking his head, complete denial.

Hoseok raises an eyebrow, "No?"

"No. Definitely not. It's not okay and I'm sorry for making you think I was avoiding you," even though he had been, "I'm just- I'm stupid. Okay? And we got off on the wrong foot. I made a complete dick of myself that night and then I made an even bigger dick of myself the second time we met and I want to start over."

"Start over?"

Hyungwon nods, "clean slate. You don't know me, I don't know you. We don't even know we're neighbors. Just, two strangers, sitting in your living room and bonding over their shared like for shitty rom coms and bowls of jajangmyun." Says Hyungwon, smiling and sticking out his hand for Hoseok to shake, "hi. I'm Chae Hyungwon, I'm twenty three and a model and wait-," he looks around like he doesn't know where he is, feigning ignorance, wide eyes meeting Hoseok's, "this is your apartment? I live right next door!"

Hoseok laughs, eyes curving with it and Hyungwon wills his heart to not skip a beat. When it does, he wills himself to remember that he's _not gay_. He takes Hyungwon's hand in his, skin soft, grip tight, "I'm Lee Hoseok, twenty four year old music producer. I hope that as a neighbor, you take good care of me." Hoseok bows his head, ash colored hair flopping over his forehead as he smiles cutely at Hyungwon. "Also, I'm not gay."

The last part comes as a shock to Hyungwon who frowns immediately, tilting his head at Hoseok. "You're not?"

Hoseok shakes his head, "I'm bisexual. Which- I guess we didn't get to that night. Wrong foot and all that. But yeah, just to set the record straight."

Well yeah... Hyungwon guesses that the record just got a little straighter. Literally. But he didn't know why this meant anything different for them, they were starting over, friends, neighbors. He could do that.

"Cool. Not that it matters. I don't care what you are, gay, straight, bisexual, all good with me." Hyungwon smiles, realizing he's still holding Hoseok's hand. He shakes it once, twice, before letting it go, holding his hand to himself, "so- friends?"

Hoseok chuckles and nods once before pulling a face and then shaking his head, "wait. Not friends. You said you were twenty three? Look at you thinking you could get away with speaking comfortably to your hyung!"

-

"That's good Hyungwon-ssi, let me get some profile." The photographer says, getting onto his knees to get Hyungwon from below while Hyungwon turns his head.

The sound of the shutter clicking and the flash going off is probably something Hyungwon could replicate in his sleep.

He's since been able to calm Kihyun down enough that we wasn't constantly sending Hyungwon death threats via text message and death glares whenever they saw each other. The shoot he had been late to had even gone well, the photographer ended up loving Hyungwon and Kihyun really had no reason to be as upset as he was since everything ended up wrapped up neatly in a little bow, but it was Kihyun. He _made_  reasons to get upset.

"I think we got the shot! Let's wrap it up," The photographer calls, smiling as he looks down at the pictures on his camera.

Hyungwon blows a plume of air up, ruffling his styled fringe as the stylists start to take back the accessories and clothes.

"The client wants him to keep the jacket. It looks good on you," the photographer directs the last part to Hyungwon himself, winking when Hyungwon looks up at him in surprise. Surely Hyungwon had gotten freebies from designers he's walked for in shows or modeled for in magazines, but this designer was so very particular, he was notorious for that and this jacket was probably more expensive than his and Jooheon's monthly rent.

He bows low immediately, "thank you, sir. I really appreciate it."

"I appreciate you. Have a good day Hyungwon-ssi." Is the last thing he says before he's off to monitor.

Hyungwon smiles at Kihyun wide, eyes curving with it and Kihyun just rolls his own, but even he can't deny that this is pretty awesome.

He gets dressed back in his comfortable clothes, worn in jeans and a hoodie, leaving the studio with a garment bag of the jacket in his hands, singing at the top of his lungs.

"AND IIIIIIIIIIII, WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUU OH," he sings to Kihyun who grimaces at him and swats at Hyungwon's stretched out hand, reaching to touch his face. Throwing the bag over his arm, he cups Kihyun's face with his hands and places a last minute and sloppy kiss on his friend's lips who sputters in disbelief and shoves Hyungwon back, "you're the most awesomely amazing manager in the world Kihyun-ah. Your ass is really tight and you probably need to get laid sometime soon before you combust but I'm so thankful you landed me that shoot. He's legendary."

Kihyun's still wiping at his lips, glaring at Hyungwon and trying to look intimidating but just ends up looking like an adorable skunk. "God, you're so lucky you have a pretty face, or I would've dropped you a long time ago."

"Kihyun-ah, you know you love me." Hyungwon gushes, pulling Kihyun into a side hug as the start walking down the sidewalk.

"Well isn't this the straightest thing I've ever seen." Hyungwon spins around to find Jooheon standing there, looking cozy in his spring jacket, deep dimples his accessories, that doesn't surprise him, though. It's who's standing beside him, in all his leather jacket covered broad shoulders and ash colored hair glory.

"Hoseok-hyung, hi." Hyungwon smiles, turning back to stand before the pair, tilting his head, "what are you guys doing here?"

"Wonho-hyung wanted to see you in action, guess we missed it." Jooheon shrugs, looking as unimpressed as always. He's since figured out that Hoseok=Wonho, that Wonho was Hoseok's producer alias and that Jooheon liked calling him that more because he was actually a fan of Hoseok's productions before they met and it was still a little weird for him to call him anything else.

"Only just," Kihyun says, swaying over and nodding his head at Hoseok and Jooheon, "Jooheon-ah, Bruce."

Hoseok flushes endearingly at the nickname, ducking his head with a small bow, "hello Kihyun-ssi. Hyungwon-ah."

"You wanted to see me model?" Hyungwon asks suddenly, meeting Hoseok's gaze as he stuffs his hands into his pockets.

"Yeah, Jooheon said he could probably get us on your set but we didn't know when it was." Hyungwon's heart swells in size at how disappointed Hoseok sounds.

"I didn't know you'd be interested. I'll let you know next time a big shoot is happening, if you'd like that."

"I would." Hoseok smiles sweetly, eyes alight at the prospect.

"God, can't you two just fuck already?" Jooheon says suddenly, cutting through the little bubble Hyungwon and Hoseok had inhabited with his crass words, "some people are sick of waiting."

"What?" Hyungwon balks, eyes widening as he looks at Jooheon, "Jooheon-ah, I'm s-,"

"Straight, yes yes. We know. Nobody loves vagina as much as you, no dick for Hyungwon, we get it." Kihyun snaps, smacking his lips as he looks down at his phone, "who's up for some pizza?" His eyes flit to Hyungwon's face for a second before glancing down at his abdomen, "no more than two slices for you if you don't want to hit the treadmill for two hours."

At the thought of pizza and skipping out on exercise has Hyungwon smiling again, forgetting that entire exchange.

He sneaks in a third slice and the only person who sees him is Hoseok. A silent agreement passes between them and Hyungwon smiles at him, just to see Hoseok smile back. He knows he won't tell.

-

Hyungwon sleeps for a full 8 hours and 45 minutes and he wishes he hadn’t.

Usually, he never dreams because he’s always too exhausted to. His brain is always too shot to think up some bright and colorful alternate universe in which he, in true Freudian fashion, lives out his most repressed wants.

In psychology class whenever his teacher would go about Freud and his greatness, Hyungwon would always drown him out and fall asleep because to him, Freud was just like any horny teenage boy that needed to get laid except he was 50 and his obsession with sex was just a little too creepy to keep him interested.

He hates to say that maybe Freud was onto something with his dream hypothesis when it came to them mostly being manifestations of basic sexual frustration in a person’s day to day life because Hyungwon dreams about Hoseok that night.

It’s nothing too graphic— he wouldn’t be able to make millions off it of in true Fifty Shades of Grey fashion— but it has him waking up in a cold sweat and a… well- a rather sizable problem in his loose pajama pants and boxers.

Since the fuck when did he dream about guys and wake up with his dick hard?

How? What? When?

If he could thoroughly side-eye himself and have it have the same deadly effect of Kihyun doing the same thing, he would. God, would he.

But he can’t. So once he gets his breaths under order and he’s been staring at the grainy grey ceiling of his that sort of reminds him of Hoseok’s ash colored hair for 20 minutes, he wills his erection away and it kind of works because he has more pressing matters to worry about.

Like the fact that he’s sort of just popping boners for guys like its nothing because— fuck that.

He’s not gay.

A soft knock on his door grabs his attention and he doesn’t answer, just turns his head towards it, watching as Jooheon’s shadow slithers in, pausing just for a second to make sure Hyungwon was still and dead to the world asleep.

Hyungwon frowns and watches his roommate tip toe across his room, to the dresser he keeps in the corner and he’s quiet as a mouse, pulling a drawer open and taking something out of it. Once he closes the drawer he starts to tiptoe out and Hyungwon takes the chance to lodge his pillow at Jooheon's shadowy form- managing to hit him square in the face.

"What the fuck?" Jooheon screeches, flailing his arms and hitting the light switch to glare at Hyungwon.

Hyungwon's mouth drops open and he glares right back, sitting up in his bed, "you're acting wronged here? I wake up to you sneaking into _my_  room and stealing shit from my drawers and you're the one acting wronged?"

Jooheon has the nerve to look sheepish, fisting whatever he had taken in his hand. "Shut up."

"What'd you take?"

"Nothing."

"Fuck you, Jooheon. What'd you take?" Hyungwon asks again, voice deathly calm. Jooheon must catch the shift in his tone because he rolls his eyes, tries to look tough and opens his hand to showcase the pair of Hyungwon's underwear he'd stolen. "Seriously?"

"What?" Jooheon squeaks, trying to sound vexed.

" _You're_ the one that's been stealing my underwear?" Hyungwon asks, reaching behind him to lodge another pillow at Jooheon's head, "I've been gripping about missing underwear for months and you're the one who has been stealing them!"

"Bro! You're acting like you don't have underwear to spare!" Jooheon shouts, tossing a pillow back in Hyungwon's direction that falls just short of Hyungwon's bed.

"Wanna know why? Because I wash mine, which is what you should be doing. Put my shit back and just so you know I'm going to start padlocking my drawers, you fucker." Hyungwon mumbles, hiding back under his covers and turning onto his side.

He hears Jooheon cursing under his breath and shuffling back to the chest of drawers, his feet dragging.

Jooheon doesn't leave though, just throws himself onto Hyungwon's bed and makes himself comfortable with one of the pillows Hyungwon had thrown at him, "5 years I've known you and never have you ever just been lying in a bed wide awake. What's keepin' you up, Waterbug?"

Hyungwon rolls his eyes, mouth curling up as he turns to his back on the bed. "I had a dream." He mumbles, knowing it'd be futile to resist telling Jooheon anything. He's pretty annoyingly persistant when he wants to be.

"A dream kept you up, or was it a nightmare?"

"Just a dream," Hyungwon sighs, "it wasn't even a bad one." The second he says that, he knows he fucked up.

"Good dreams don't wake people- unless... it was one of _those_  dreams?" Jooheon smirks, Hyungwon can hear it in his voice. He closes his eyes shut tight and groans loudly. "A _nice_  dream?"

"Jooheon-,"

"Who was it about? Where were you? What happened? Was it a celebrity? Was Sarah Jessica Parker sucking your tiny dick or something?"

"Shut the fuck up," Hyungwon groans, barely able to deal with Jooheon's excitability, "my dick isn't small and the _last_  thing I would dream about would be Sarah Jessica Parker coming anywhere near it."

"Last thing? Even before Wonho-hyung?"

Hyungwon doesn't dare to dignify that with a response, choosing instead to shove Jooheon off his bed with a foot planted firmly against his guts.

-

"So, you think he's hot, he thinks you're hot but you won't fuck him because you're 'not gay'." Changkyun has a knack for over simplifying things that are a lot more complicated in reality and usually Hyungwon just ignores him when he gets all deadpanned (which is all the time) but right now he feels the need to defend himself because- none of that even made any _sense_.

"I don't think he's hot." Hyungwon starts to deny shaking his head.

"You said, and I quote," Minhyuk, resident gay and Changkyun's doting boyfriend, says flailing his hands and looking down at a notebook he'd been jotting notes in, "that this Wonho has arms that could put Zeus' to shame, eyes carved out of diamonds and a body you could make smores on-- and none of that equates to hot to you?"

Hyungwon rolls his eyes, "I didn't say any of that."

"We have you recorded, hyung," Changkyun says, starting to fiddle with his phone and Hyungwon breaks before he could humiliate himself anymore.

"Fuck, okay- so I think he's hot! But thinking he's hot and wanting to fuck him are two very different things." Hyungwon continues to stack the defenses against him, sinking into Minhyuk and Changkyun's couch and hating the way they're both sitting across from him shoulder to shoulder on the floor like they're interrogating him.

This isn't the fucking Spanish Inquisition.

"They're not _very_ different." Minhyuk says, raising an eyebrow.

"I wouldn't want to fuck Minhyuk hyung if I didn't think he was hot." Changkyun says, sounding all matter of fact.

Hyungwon sort of expects Minhyuk to get mad at that but he just nods, tilts his head and says, "ditto."

"Mmh, it's nice to know your relationship is based on vanity and lacks a solid basis of connection and fidelity or love." Hyungwon replies with a snort.

"I mean, there's that stuff, too." Changkyun shrugs, tilting sideways to rest his head on Minhyuk's shoulder.

"Yeah, but it started with the hot stuff. It sort of always does." Minhyuk chimes in.

"Exactly. The love and bubblegum shit you're prattling on about almost always comes after the 'fuck this person is hot' thoughts and every good relationship stems from acknowledging that."

Minhyuk nods, "Right, and once you acknowledge the hotness of said person and start to spend more time with them, you realize its really nice that they're hot because now they're also funny and smart and cuddly and you kind of wanna spend the rest of your life with them."

"And it doesn't matter the conventionality of how hot this person is as long as you personally find them hot. It also doesn't matter if you're gay or not because life isn't all about existential crises' and internal monologue. Sometimes its just as easy to do what feels right and worry about the meaning shit afterwards." Changkyun mumbles dryly, silently preening once Minhyuk rests his cheek on the top of his boyfriend's head.

"Our point is. You find Zeus arms, Bruce Wayne sounding guy hot, so do something about it. We get it. You don't want to bring about the whole 'you might be gay' idea because it may be kind of earth shattering and life changing, but it could also be as simple as switching to briefs after wearing boxers your whole life."

"Or drinking lactose free milk."

"Or buying a new pair of jeans," Minhyuk says pointedly, looking at Hyungwon's pants like they personally offended him, "all those designer companies signing your paychecks and you can't even buy new pants?"

"Shut up." Hyungwon frowns, leaning his hand back against the back of the couch and crossing his arms. "But-- what if I try it. What if I do something about it and I don't like it? I'm not gay? How would that be fair to Hoseok? I don't want to hurt him."

"You won't. All of this is mostly to get you out of your own head." Changkyun replies, rolling his eyes.

"Basically," Minhyuk nods, his arms moving. Hyungwon has a feeling they're playing with each other's hands under the table.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Hyungwon asks, watching them and trying not to be offended.

"We'll leave that up to you to figure out." It doesn't even matter who says that because the looks on both their faces show they agree.

Hyungwon leaves just as confused as he came.

-

Hyungwon doesn't run over to find Hoseok right after Minhyuk and Changkyun's interrogation. He doesn't even try the next day or the day after that.

It isn't until, like, a week later that he finds himself staring at the familiar looking silver numbers adorning Hoseok's puke green front door. It took a lot of talking himself down and asking more of his 'friends' what he should do. He even called Kihyun, and that went about as well as anyone would expect. He didn't even laugh for as long as Hyungwon thought he would, but after half an hour Hyungwon got a little pissed off and threatened to fire Kihyun as his manager if he didn't even try to give him some kind of advice.

In the end, "just go over to his house and suck his dick," was all Kihyun could come up with and Hyungwon figured he'd wasted enough of his own time.

Now here he was and he didn't even have a game plan in mind because Hyungwon never thought he'd be here. Its just... every time he's with Hoseok, he gets this insatiable need to _kiss_  him, or just stand a little closer to him, breathe in his familiar cologne, have his undivided attention and he doesn't just feel things like that. Not with anybody- girls or guys or anyone. He's told himself he's not gay since all of this started, but he can't deny that his heart stutters a little in his chest when Hoseok says his name and he's been dreaming about the other man more and more every night.

Sometimes they're not even dirty dreams (most of the time they are) but its just them doing cheesy rom com shit like hanging out at the beach or sitting around in simulated dream living rooms and enjoying each other's company. It fucking freaks him out and for the most part, all of his friends had been right.

He had to do something about it.

Raising his fist to the door, he knocks before he could psych himself out and run back next door to his own apartment. He's so tempted to just get back into his room, lock the door and hide under the bed until Jooheon had enough of his wallowing and did something about it. That would give him a solid week and a half at least... maybe it isn't too lat-

"Hyungwon, hey." Hoseok answers, tugging his door open and catching Hyungwon with his body angled to do just what his nerves were begging to do and just run the fuck away. "To what do I owe this pleasure?" He asks in a way that would sound stupid coming from anybody else, a goofy grin on his perfect face. Its so fucking infuriating, the things that just watching Hoseok smile could make his heart do in his chest, like its on a high velocity rollercoaster with infinite loopdie-loops to go around before screeching to a precarious halt and just fucking stopping.

Holy fuck. Who would've thought Hyungwon was a fucking poet.

"Hey- I," Hyungwon starts, voice scratchy before he takes a second to clear it and shake the nerves off, "I have to tell you something and I just- I can't have you interrupting me, okay? I just need to get it all off my chest all at once and all you have to do is listen."

"Okay?" Hoseok replies, watching Hyungwon oddly, "do you want to come in, or?"

"No. I'll stand right here." Because if Hoseok rejects him or tells him to go away, the walk of shame won't be as far as if he's already inside, sat comfortably at Hoseok's dining table. He's preparing for the worst so that he isn't let down and living under his bed is still an option if everything goes to shit, "so- like... I think I probably like you." He says quickly, looking at the ground where the carpet that lines the hallway transitions to cold marble as it crosses into Hoseok's house, "and I know that I'm constantly talking about how not gay I am but I don't think that ever mattered with you. Because you make me feel really nice when we're together? Like besides the fact that you're hot as fuck, you make me laugh, and you're so bright that sometimes I feel like I need shades to look at you in the morning. And I think these last couple of months just getting to know you have been no doubt the best of my life and I don't know what any of this means other than the fact that I think I'm falling in love with you." He's out of breath by the time he's done and doesn't look up at Hoseok until that last word has left his mouth.

He can't decipher the look on Hoseok's face and thats scarier than the fact that he's wearing nothing but his heart on his sleeve and he can't take anything he's just said back. That he doesn't want to.

"So-- yeah. Kihyun, Jooheon, Changkyun and Minhyuk all threatened to disembody me if I didn't man up and tell you. They're all my friends but they're already siding with you. In their defense, I am a dumbass." Hyungwon shrugs his shoulder and scratches at the back of his neck and he's never felt so awkward in his life.

"You are." Hoseok speaks _finally_ and Hyungwon gasps, nearly choking on his spit looking at Hoseok with wide eyes, "but I guess thats part of your entire package, isn't it." He's smirking, and for a second Hyungwon feels the tight grip on his heart lessen. "Hyungwon-ah, do you want to come in?"

Hyungwon just nods minutely before following Hoseok into his apartment.

-

Hyungwon can't remember the last time he kissed anyone let alone the last time he never wanted to _stop_  kissing someone. There was Hwang Min Ah in first grade when his head had still been a little too heavy on his shoulders and he spoke with a lisp a little less adorable than Hoseok's. She had kissed him during recess under the tree and it had only lasted a few seconds but it'd been nice, soft.

There was Shin Bora after that in high school and she'd tasted like bubblegum and smelled like coffee and Hyungwon remembered thinking how weird that combination was until she cornered him in the boys lockerroom and kissed him up against the lockers in front of every one. He remembered that kiss being wet and uncomfortable and he remembered squeezing his eyes shut and hoping she would just stop before it was over. All the guys had patted him on the shoulder, hooting and hollering after she left but he didn't feel proud or accomplished, just remembered wanting to forget it ever happened.

Then there had been Nam Bo Young in university, with her high heels and flawless bun coiled tight at the top of her head. The time he kissed her, he remembered it being the first time she had her hair down and her makeup was smeared and she'd broken a heel. It didn't go past a kiss and she didn't remember his name the next morning and Hyungwon had been oddly fine with that.

But Hoseok had just led him into his home, sat him down and they just sort of stared at each other for a few awkward moments before they were kissing and Hyungwon felt like he hadn't been breathing his whole life before Hoseok's lips touched his.

He doesn't know how long its been, but Hyungwon has nothing to compare this too. None of the mere pecks from girls in his adolescence could add up to the actual feeling of him burning alive once their tongues meet. Its paralyzing.

"Okay so- I need a minute." Hyungwon sighs, hand on Hoseok's neck, their bodies pulled flush. They only made it to the couch, curled up on one end and Hyungwon thinks if they keep going this way, he's going to fucking die. It wouldn't be a bad way to go, now that he gives it some thought, "You're way too good at that."

"You're not so bad yourself." Hoseok smiles, fingers combing through Hyungwon's hair where its shorter on the sides. "If I think about how long we could've been doing this-,"

"Don't, I'm sorry." Hyungwon groans, burying his face in Hoseok's neck, "I'm a dumbass."

Hoseok laughs and he's warm against Hyungwon's body, their cheeks pressed together.

"You're not. It's okay, Hyungwon-ah. I'm just glad you got here. That we're here now." Hoseok says and Hyungwon hums, closing his eyes and savoring the moment before pulling back and meeting his eyes.

He smiles when Hoseok grins at him, his happiness contagious and something warm blooms in the pit of his stomach and he leans in to kiss Hoseok again.

"Okay, break over. More kisses, please." Hyungwon says, just before their lips touch.

-

"You owe me $300."

"$300?!" Hyungwon squawks, indigent as he stares at Minhyuk who's sat across from him in the dark club, legs crossed demurely and leaning into Changkyun's side. He's got a shameless hand out and Hyungwon already wants to smack him for interrupting the makeout session him and Hoseok had been engaged in and he's not making that much of a case for himself. "I might seriously punch you."

"Swing first, bitch." Minhyuk smirks, raising an eyebrow. Hyungwon rolls his eyes.

"I really don't know why I'm friends with these people." He groans, rolling his head on Hoseok's shoulder, "you know, generally, people have to know they're apart of a bet before they agree to paying off for one."

Minhyuk purses his lips and leans forward to pull something out of his back pocket. Its a piece of paper and he hands it over to Hyungwon silently.

Changkyun's got a smile on his face and Hoseok's chuckling next to him once they both read the crudely written contract.

_I hereby promise to pay Minhyuk $300 if I'm caught sucking Hoseok's dick before the end of the month._

It's dated and has Hyungwon's signature at the end.

"What the actual fuck." Hyungwon mumbles, jaw unhinged as he stares at his 'friends', "I don't know how you fucking did this but it can't be legally binding."

"I got it notarized."

"Our lawyer was present."

"Yup, all legal." Kihyun nods. He's been there the whole time, sitting with his boyfriend Shownu (that wasn't his name but he _insisted_  everybody refer to him as nothing but that) and sipping at his drink.

"Kihyun, what the fuck?"

" _Hyung_ , what the fuck." Kihyun corrects, tilting his head, "what? They asked for legal advice and I was free. You definitely don't pay me enough."

"Okay, two semesters of law school before dropping out does not a lawyer make. And you're fired. I'm firing you. I'm firing all of you." Hyungwon huffs, he tosses the paper back to Minhyuk, crossing his arms over his chest, "and I haven't been caught sucking Hoseok's dick so shove that up your ass. Thank you very much."

Minhyuk just shrugs, carefully folding the paper back up and placing it back into his pockets, "no problem. We'll wait." He says that at the same time Changkyun points to his eyes with two fingers and then at Hyungwon in the 'we'll be watching you' kind of way and Hyungwon hates them all.

Jooheon comes stumbling up the stares to the platform they're sitting on, falling in a heap next to Hyungwon on the plush chairs and breathing hard, a sheen of sweat glistening on his skin in the pastel and vibrant strobe lights of the club, "you gays really know how to tear up a dance floor."

"Oh my God."

"What?! No offense, I'm just being honest! If I knew either of you guys could dance so well I would've gone out with y'all more often." Jooheon throws his hands into the air, glaring around their circle of friends accusatory and drunk off his fucking face, effectively starting an argument with Minhyuk about the jab at his dance moves.

They bicker back and forth until Changkyun's dragged in and somehow pulls Kihyun into it and Shownu's doing a valiant job at holding him back with one hand and Hyungwon leans back into Hoseok, groaning loud and wondering how this was his life.

"I hate my friends." He moans, lips against Hoseok's jaw as Hoseok laughs, caressing Hyungwon's cheek and pressing a kiss to the top of his head.

"Considering they sorta got us together?" Hoseok says low enough for just him to hear, arm around Hyungwon's shoulders, "I don't think they're so bad."

 

**Author's Note:**

> Why do I legit write for every fandom?  
> Anyways, hope y'all liked this. Its been in my notes since last year and I thought, why not post it? Also my friend read this and would not take me not posting it as an answer so... if y'all hate it, blame her. Lemme know your thoughts ^_^
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